Duck Dynasty- Or how I learned to stop being outraged and spot a troll

Duck Dynasty:

The title should tip ya’ll off. This is a “dynasty”- sons and grandsons being the inheritors of pop’s hard work and smarts. Maybe Phil and Si ( ok not maybe DEFINITELY) are rednecks but the sons? I found some great pre-beard photos of them and they look like preppy metro guys.

No redneck guy I have EVER EVER met would wear tennis shoes. EVER. IDGAF that Jax on SOA wears them. NO real redneck/country boy wears tennis shoes mudding. We got trolled.

The Robertson (CLAN) have trolled all of white lower middle class racist christian southern midwestern people into Wal-Mart and A&E. The family has made more millions in 2 years on reality tv than the Duck Commander call would have ever grossed. Ever. So white people wake up. Your hero has a Master’s. The sons went to college and were little golf playing preppy boys that is why they have hot ( surgically altered- check the photos pre-beard) wives. The family have shown internet savvy as they titled an episode “John Luke after Dentist” playing on the  eponymous title of the viral video depicting a child after an especially trippy dentist visit.

Poppy Phil married Kay when she was 16 and he was 20. This was not a crime then but I still find it very creepy and sort of controlling.  Probably to make sure he had a “good Labrador/wife”. Now those bestiality comments make sense.

He thinks good women and good dogs are alike. Yep. He screws his dogs. And I have a first amendment right to say that. Right? His comments about blacks are not ignorant. He really thinks because he doesn’t hate black people that what he said is just fine. See I think he is a bigot if you are “one of those blacks”. You know. The ones that don’t think that the South shall rise again and all that fucking malarkey.

In the end he is an old racist white douche that has trolled us. His family is fake. They are greedy and prideful and boasting and gluttonous. All sins by the way.


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